My personal story is just that, mine. No two people are alike in their health and what worked for me may not work for others, but I think it’s important to share at least part of my story to give any readers of this blog an idea of where I am coming from and what I have gone through.
Let’s go back about 5 years when I was in the position of being full-time caregiver to my quadriplegic husband and also caring for his aging mother of 83. I had put on some serious poundage the previous years before (my own bad food choices) and it was showing in my inability to bend and move the way that was required when showering people and giving care needed for daily living. I had some serious discussions in my head about losing weight and I knew that this was the time. That year a new diet pill was coming to market and as I have always done, I researched it out and found that it was safe. I won’t name the product because I cannot stand behind it anymore with the knowledge that I have at this time, but at that time, I thought it was my answer. So, I started to do some serious dieting. I felt very confident in this move, especially since my profession was a Medical Transcriptionist and I had even heard many doctors prescribe this wonder pill for others. I had grown up respecting doctors and modern medicine. I loved it, in fact so much that I leaned my career in the direction of medicine.
With much resolve and will-power I started the wonder pill and walking..and voila the weight came off. With the incentive of the weight actually coming off, something none of the other diets that I had done over the course of my life ever did, I continued to walk and diet, walk and diet. Seriously,,I was absolutely stoked at the weight that I was losing. I felt better than I had in years and after all was said and done, 46 lbs had been shed from my small frame. Yeah,,so you’re probably wondering what the problem was right? I maintained this weight for over a year,,but then it happened, the weight started coming back. More exercise and more dieting did nothing. I picked up the pace,,,joined a gym and took a step class, yoga, weight training,,ate less and less, and not only did the weight come back,..but it came back with a vengeance. The weight was just the beginning…fatigue started hitting me every morning. I could barely crawl out of bed to go work out and my exercise tolerance was not at all what it used to be.
Slowly over the course of the next year depression followed fatigue, aches in joints came next then a list of symptoms that I thought I would only feel if I lived to be 90 years old. My hair started falling out, and even though I always had pretty thick hair it was now thin, dry and unhealthy. My skin constantly itched and hives would break out on me regularly. My toenails and finger nails both had ridges and did not grow. I had emotional outbursts that, again, were not like me. My awesome husband, who did not deserve the tongue lashings, got a rash of anger, crying and hysteria that would have made the bravest man run for cover. The hard part was I knew it was wrong and I would apologize, only to turn around in an hour or less and start over.
My concentration level was shot and that made it extremely difficult to get through work. It’s hard to concentrate on a long surgery when your mind keeps drifting. The job I had once loved, was becoming a horrible chore. One of the worst parts of all these symptoms was my inability to retain what I would read. I love to read the bible and my devotions were just not the same. I could not concentrate and even if I did concentrate,,I couldn’t remember what I read. I lost interest in my favorite hobbies, and my favorite past time became sleeping. I couldn’t wait to finish work and sometimes didn’t make it,,before I would throw myself to the sofa for a nap.